Six on Caturday: 21 April 2017

My servant, whom I lovingly refer to as “The Dork” is doing other things today so I have stepped into the breach. The Dork says I have to write about six things in the garden. Well that’s about the number of lives I have left. 
But I don’t want to give you too much me in one go. You’d be overwhelmed by my pawgeousness. And anyway, I’m not a “thing” in the garden. Instead, I’ll stroll around my domain, taking a look at things from from my sensible down low perspective. We cats are definitely more sensible than humans. I mean, why does Gill Heavens use tonic water to shave her legs?
I often watch The Dork digging holes in the garden. He digs a hole then he puts something in it to fill it. So the hole is no more. Why did he dig it in the first place? He waits for plants to flower. Then he cuts the flowers off and carries them into a room I’m not allowed to enter. Will someone explain to me why “leather furniture and claws” translates to “you’re not going in there!”.
I would climb a few trees but it’s difficult with a camera hanging round my neck, weighing me down. So I’m at ground level.
1. Daphne odorata ‘Perfume Princess’.

The Dork has two of these, bred by someone he knows in New Zealand. I think he’s mentioned before that they started flowering way before Christmas. Well they’re still flowering. And the smell! It assaults my sensitive nose. Dork, on the other hand, loves the smell. He has a bench with one of these at each end. He’ll sit there for ages, with a glass of wine, sniffing away.

I think he may have caught a cold.

2. Epimedium something or other.

This was (and still is) in a forgotten part of the garden. The plant had spread far and wide (well it was a long way for me to walk past it). The Dork decided on a drastic strategy. Well he can be impulsive! He cut everything down to the ground.

And he has been rewarded with flowers.

3. Myosotis

Ha! The Dork thought he’d eradicated Forget-me-nots from the garden. From up there, where he is, maybe he has. But down here, I can see what he can’t. No, not that strange large blue patch at the top of the photo. Move your gaze down half way. To the right and left of centre. Yes, THOSE patches of blue.

Do you think I should tell him?

4. Paeonia cambedesii

This is one of The Dork’s new alpine plants which he planted in that thing he calls “Edifice 2”. He wasn’t expecting it to flower this year but it has. Paeonia cambedessii is such a long name for such a pretty little flower, don’t you think?

5. Trillium kurabayashii

Don’t you gardeners love long names! This is a bit of boundary pushing. Something The Dork likes doing. This plant is supposed to be in shade but it’s in bright sunlight in Edifice 2. Still, it must be happy as it’s flowering.

6. Tulips

I don’t know why The Dork hasn’t posted piccythings of these. OK, there are red ones and purple ones (there are also supposed to be orange ones but they’ve gone walkies somewhere). But I like the surprise off white with purple bits ones. Maybe they’re the orange ones in disguise.

The Dork tells me that the guy who runs this show, Mr Propagator, has recently become slave to two kittens. Which makes him a probationary double-dork I suppose. (Hey, you two, if you want advice on dork training, just get in touch.) Anyhow, if you pop over to his blog, you’ll find his Six for today. At the bottom of that there’ll be a growing list of links to other blogs whose owners have written Sixes too. Some of them may also be cat servants.
As for me, I now have to go back to being an ordinary cat. I used to be famous. I had more Twitter followers than The Dork. I’m a Vanalike, you know, and still webmaster of the Vanalikes Club but I just can’t get the staff to help me to update things. My page is way out of date; YouTube channel’s disappeared; website’s gone; blog’s gone. The Dork is useless. I used to be one of The Aviators. That was fun.
I was a dragon-rider
I was featured on billboards in the USA
Maybe I need to relocate again and find more co-operative staff. Still, now I’m off to patrol the neighbourhood before my mid-morning nap. Where did The Dork leave my Dreamies, I wonder. He probably forgot to put those out for me. I repeat, The Dork is useless. I will have my revenge one day.

20 thoughts on “Six on Caturday: 21 April 2017

    1. The Dork was a triple dork for some years but he failed the exam when he also got a smelly doggie! And the cats trained the smelly doggie to use a litter tray! The Dork never learned how to use one of those.

    1. Fanx yoo. Of course it’s well written, I’m a cat. Pawfect.

  1. Brilliant. I’ve never seen an alpine paeony, highly desirable. I had a forget-me-not cull a few years ago but then took my eye off of the ball. My largest border is a sea of blue now but it does look lovely.

    1. The Dork has two alpine peonies. The other is supposed to flower more blousily, as he puts it. But there are no buds on it. Yet. I don’t think Dork minded the forget-me-nots as long as they stayed put but they started to spread everywhere so he declared war. I think he’s not won yet! 😉

    1. The Dork had forgotten what he’d chosen and was just walking past a mass of foliage. So he hacked it back to stumps. And flowers appeared. Then he found his old planting diaries in a box in the attic and realised he had some Epimediums in the garden. He hasn’t found the rest yet though!

  2. Awesome ! : I laughed while reading your post this afternoon and the view from the ground level is completely different …. (in fact, if The Dork digs holes to plant, avoid destroying everything after, he will start again…)

    1. But I have to keep nibbling things he plants (or curling up on them). I think it’s good for him to start again. Maybe one day he will get things right! They say people learn from their mistakes. He must be learning an awful lot.

    1. My WHAT? I am a cat, not a dog! But fanx yoo for the kind comment.

    1. Sometimes small is beautiful. I am always training The Dork. He’s a slow learner. Do you know, when he digs a hole for something, I have to curl up in it to make sure it’s big enough?

        1. Eeeeek! If I stayed too long in a hole the blind bat would probably bury me beneath a plant. Last month he locked me in the garage and went off to his gardening group. A neighbour heard me screaming and phoned him to ask where he thought I was.

    1. Fanx yoo (that’s cat speak – how are we supposed to know proper English words when our dorks speak to us as they do to babies?).

  3. Your Dork does grow some lovely plants, I like the peonies, you have make me chuckle this morning, great writing skills for a cat, you have been taught well from the master

    1. Ahem! I am the master! I was Twittering and blogging before The Dork. He learned from me. I’m waiting for him to plant out my annual nip patch. It has to be annual because I squish it. Which means he plants it late when the plants are big enough to put up with my curled-up weight through the summer.

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