*Gently peers around door*. Uh, folks, remember me? It’s been a year but, like the proverbial bad penny, I’m back. Or is it like the prodigal son whose return causes much joy and celebration? Or, in Devon, a collective sigh of “Here we go again”.

I suppose it’s appropriate that, just as my last blog post was a Six, the first on my re-awakening is also a Six. I have been reading, of course, and all praise and thanks to Prop, the creator, must be given for managing to keep the motley crew (including Devonians) under control. If you haven’t already, pop across to the blog of our Glorious Leader to feast your fancies on other contributions from the growing SoS community.

So off we jolly well go, without further ado (except for oldies who may appreciate the casual reference to Norman Vaughan in the title of this post)….

I’m doing roses this week.

My first is my favourite rose – “Peace”. This particular specimen has a place in my heart as it was planted in memory of someone. We know it as “Peace” but its formal name is “Rosa ‘Madame A. Meilland”. It has an interesting history, involving war as well as peace. I’ll leave you to look it up.

Number 2 is “Prince William”. I’m not sure if that’s the second-in-line or some other Prince William. It grows in a straggly sort of way and could probably do as a climber though I let it run free as a rambler, which it probably isn’t really. Still, it’s reliable. No discernable scent but a good flowerer.

Number 3 is “Peek-a-Boo”. Well that’s what was on the label when I was given it. A weird sort of plant really. Impossible to contain, however hard I prune. It forms a big bush and, once it gets out of bed, flowers profusely, tangles into itself and is left to run rampant until I chop it down in the autumn. Impossible to dead-head without removing half-a-dozen buds. I just leave it alone.

There may be something in the soil. I don’t know. The books say that number 4, a.k.a. Wild Edric, is a hedging rose. Well if I wanted a hedge of roses I’d aim for about 3 feet tall, not the 6 feet that Edric grows to every year. But whatever, he knows what “profusion” means. From early April through to whenever, I can guarantee at least a dozen blooms at a time on what has become an almost fastigiate bush rose. I just decided to let Eddie have his way and go on up.

The guy whom we all know as The Prop is a regular visitor to the pity benches in “the sheds”. Me, not so much. But number 5 was an aquisition from the deceased table at my local B&Q (where the living tables don’t look that different). One of two pity purchases, the other of which died. This one, though, has done OK. Rose “Love and Wishes”, a.k.a. Number 5, is definitely alive.

Harrumph! I share this rose with a certain Devonian (you will, perhaps, appreciate a certain connection which is due to a matriarch being more sensible and living just up the road here in Wales). “Rhapsody in Blue” is usually the first of my roses to flower. This year, she’s tardy so won’t be getting fruit cup (cue another shady reference to Cloris Leachman in the Mel Brooks’ film “High Anxiety”. Do keep up, people). So you get buds and not blooms. But a man’s gotta do and all that so she still makes up the sixth of my six.

So that wasn’t so bad really. I made it through. For those that might be interested:

• Since my last post, I’ve had 2 birthdays
• Since my last post, my waist measurement did go up but has returned to its statutory 32″ and my weight remains at 11 stone exactly. Feel free to weep!
• Since my last post, my mission to irritate Devonians has been pursued religiously and I’m probably holding firm at about 85% irritability.
• Since my last post, my propensity to order too many plants has increased exponentially. However, this year, I plead ignorance inasmuch as when I thought I was ordering 300 bedding plants of variety X, I failed to notice the “BOGOF” bit in the blurb and so received 600.
• Since my last post, I have reduced the amount of alcohol I drink. Intravenous drips are wonderful things. And you don’t have to lift the glass.

Have a great Saturday folks. Stay safe. Stay well.